Aside

I had a nightmare earlier.

It was about my family.

I’m positively scared of the day it happens.

On a side note, I’m bothered by an overly-concerned colleague.

That dude needs to chill with all the texts.

Reflection!

I had a very interesting catch up with 2 friends from my past. They’ve made me realise how my perspective had changed over the last 10 years.

Coincidentally, both of them found me on facebook (urg social media).

Both of them reminded me of a different me from my childhood/ teenage days.

Friend A: I met her in secondary school. She was a junior that lived near me and we hung out often because of our common interest of sports. She was living with her Dad then and did not have any one take care of her daily meals. Being a senior, I felt compelled to help even though I was only 2 years older …

“I still remember that time you came to my house to cook cabbage and dried shrimp for me to eat. haha.” she texted me.

Wow. Now that she shared it, I totally remember trying to cook up a storm at her place with my horrible cooking skills. I wanted to make sure that she was able to have some home-cooked food. Friend A is doing pretty well now, studying and travelling. Something I’ll never imagine her doing and I’m really happy for her.

Friend B: I met her in primary school. She was only in my class for a year and had to transfer to another class due to her falling grades. I had fun doing athletics with her because she was a really good runner and had a very kind outlook. We went to the same secondary school but she dropped out in the third or forth year because she got pregnant. Her beautiful child is 10 years old now.

“.. I’m selling XX Canadian coffee now.. do you mind to give a little support?”

Whoa. That was the start of an awkward exchange of messages. Yes. I did give a little support in the end but I totally didn’t feel comfortable. But knowing she’s trying very hard to support her child and making a living, I just helped. It just felt different.

Both ‘reunions’ made me recall that I used to be a courageous individual that would go all out to help a friend in need. It seems like after leaving school, I haven’t exactly opened my heart to any friend fully. I question my friends’ moves most of the time. I might have portrayed myself a neutral party in most situations, choosing to sit out of conflicts.

I just realised I haven’t lived as what my teenage self would want me to. I wondered. Is that really what growing up means?

Reflect!

Reflect!

Instead Of Looking For Love, Look For The Right Person To Fall In Love With

Thought Catalog

You learn a lot about dating from watching how your parents love. You can learn from their mistakes. After my parents’ divorce, my mother became a serial monogamist, as if she would float away without a guy around. The actual guy seemed almost impersonal somehow — as if his personality and his characteristics didn’t matter, just the fact that he existed. Rather than being single and having to do the hard work of dealing with yourself, it was easier to deal with someone else’s flaws and imperfections. Even if they weren’t right or the love of your life, at least they were there.

Something about that mentality always reminded me of Jane Austen, looking at love as transactional. In the 19th century, having a husband mattered in that you had to have one — and that was the end of the story. There was no real love or romance, just…

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